it’s not “psycho the rapist” - it is psychotherapist please!
Photo copyright Suresh Gundappa 2007 Visit my Gallery
Zen fable by Suresh
Prominent Doctor opened his new clinic and wanted to have his clinic’s board ready as early as possible. He asked the low cost painter to write his profession as Psychotherapist. but to his horror he found the name was completely screwed up contrary to what he communicated.
Painter had written “Psycho the rapist” instead of Psychotherapist. Doctor started shouting at him for such a mess. but the painter calmly replied “Sir I have written what you said ” how do I understand what you are trying to say? I am not educated like you, I understand from my own little intelligence, it is your mistake as you should have explained it properly for an idiot like me in a proper manner”
This is how we work in relationships, half the time we spend energy on explaining the other our view point. but the other concludes your thoughts with his or her own thoughts. we constantly crib about other not understanding your view point. It happens with your friends, relatives, wife, husband, children, colleagues, ……. Our mind, our judgments, our anxiety drives our communication to nuts.
Biggest struggle of our times in relationships is of communication. In communication we are unable to relate and hence the relationships are under strain. that’s why when you are in Love it is so easy to communicate thru hands, eyes, heart. the moment Love disappears you bang each others head to communicate.Our education is of mind oriented communication. But Love, Prayer, Poetry, Art, dance all are form communication thru Heart.
Say it from the heart whatever you say and there is a good chance other one understands it the way you want them to understand it!
Meditation is art of communicating through silence. Meditation is hearing what has been not said. Meditation is language of heart.
Love
Suresh
If communication is not understood in the way u wanted by others the result
is the work of painter as above. It is really important to ensure that what u are saying is taken rightly by others and it is on right path. otherwise it will be a mess arguments anger fight what not
both post and photo are nice
This is a great story which illustrates responsibility in communication. Communication takes a minimum of two people, both of which must be resposible in their role.
BTW - This is the second day in a row that I heard the psyco the rapist used.
A note on written communication…
~ Eats, Shoots & Leaves is a really fun book by Lynn Truss, and they’ve given a neat online educational companion on the website as well. Of course in a way this is quite tangential to the theme of this post and so much of attention to punctuation some may argue is a triviality. But still I’m posting this here because in another way I feel the care Lynne stresses on putting into our writing is the same care we could put into our communication whatever the means, even if its through silence. Hmm I guess maybe to say things from the heart as you’ve said Suresh, may translate to not being careless, not taking - even inadvertently - the precious relationships we have in our life for granted, but taking care.
Esp if there’s some mismatch of ideas, then we want to enforce our views on others… and when its being enforced I guess it does not qualify as communication. Because communication in this context as I understand is two - way.
As praneshji has said, it is important to ensure that others take it rightly.
But… if they don’t, then what?
Here is an answer I happened to have came across so far… (am optimistic that other readers here may give better answers!)
As tobene has said about TWO-WAY: we need to be as receptive to the other person as we want to convey our ideas (maybe sometimes more so).
This sometimes requires us to extend our patience beyond what we have assumed it is limited to.
Because we need to really need to conquer our haste in conveying our idea, but try and understand the other person first.
What I’d like to know is how you are able to get these amazing photos of wildlife and wild vistas. Your photos continue to astonish me and your written wisdom always lifts my spirit!
Simple secret Jana, I am inspired by artists like you!
Your blog is nice. I think you should add your blog at http://www.blogadda.com and let more people discover your blog. It’s a great place for Indian bloggers to be in and I am sure it would do wonders for your blog.
Thanks Deepanjali,. I will try,
Having written all that, I’m wondering how closely all the posts on these pages are so interlinked
(so went back and added hyperlinks)! Suresh you only speak about love and meditation, and it looks like
that’s what communication is coming down to…!
One of of the best chapters from Old Path White Clouds is: Love is Understanding. Just the title of the chapter itself is so amazing…!
A small excerpt…
And communication certainly helps in building this understanding!
Sometimes its hard to communicate with some people who have some grudge - some rock-hard pre-conceived notions. Lets say they’re hell-bent on wanting to be miserable ( to get attention?). The book Illusions (Richard Bach) talks about how people end up in a certain kind of movie (some like horror, some like tragedy movies, etc), because they bought the ticket for the movie.
Actively chose to not communicate! Best solution may be to leave them alone, but this may not always be feasible, or it may not really help. Esp if they’re a family member or a close friend. Then an alternative could use to use creativity in coming up with different ways to communicate!
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(PS: sorry to spam with multiple comments, but for some reason I was having some errors, and finally this breaking up into parts was a solution that finally worked)
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so true! such beautiful words. thankyou for your continual inspiration.